Author |
Topic Search Topic Options
|
Nigel
Moderator Group
Joined: 09-November-2002
Status: Offline
Points: 6941
|
Topic: Computer helpdesk funnies Posted: 18-January-2005 at 19:39 |
Helpdesk: What kind of computer do you have? Female customer: A white one...
Hi, this is Celine. I can't get my diskette out. Helpdesk: Have you tried pushing the button? Customer: Yes, sure, it's really stuck. Helpdesk: That doesn't sound good; I'll make a note ..."
Customer: No ... wait a minute... I hadn't inserted it yet... it's still on my desk... sorry ....
Helpdesk: Click on the 'my computer' icon on to the left of the screen. Customer: Your left or my left?
Helpdesk: Good day. How may I help you? Male customer: Hello... I can't print. Helpdesk: Would you click on start for me and . Customer: Listen pal; don't start getting technical on me! I'm not Bill Gates damn it!
Hi good afternoon, this is Martha, I can't print. Every time I try it says 'Can't find printer'. I've even lifted the printer and placed it in front of the monitor, but the computer still says he can't find it...
Customer: I have problems printing in red... Helpdesk: Do you have a color printer? Customer: Aaaah....................thank you.
Helpdesk: What's on your monitor now ma'am? Customer: A teddy bear my boyfriend bought for me in the supermarket.
Helpdesk: And now hit F8. Customer: It's not working. Helpdesk: What did you do, exactly? Customer: I hit the F-key 8-times as you told me, but nothing's happening...
Customer: My keyboard is not working anymore. Helpdesk: Are you sure it's plugged into the computer? Customer: No. I can't get behind the computer. Helpdesk: Pick up your keyboard and walk 10 paces back. Customer: OK Helpdesk: Did the keyboard come with you? Customer: Yes Helpdesk: That means the keyboard is not plugged in. Is there another keyboard? Customer: Yes, there's another one here. Ah...that one does work!
Helpdesk: Your password is the small letter a as in apple, a capital letter V as in Victor, the number 7. Customer: Is that 7 in capital letters?
A customer couldn't get on the internet. Helpdesk: Are you sure you used the right password? Customer: Yes I'm sure. I saw my colleague do it. Helpdesk: Can you tell me what the password was? Customer: Five stars.
Helpdesk: What antivirus program do you use? Customer: Netscape. Helpdesk: That's not an antivirus program. Customer: Oh, sorry...Internet Explorer.
Customer: I have a huge problem. A friend has placed a screensaver on my computer, but every time I move the mouse, it disappears!
Helpdesk: Microsoft Tech. Support, may I help you? Old woman: Good afternoon! I have waited over 4 hours for you. Can you please tell me how long it will take before you can help me? Helpdesk: Uhh..? Pardon, I don't understand your problem? Old woman: I was working in Word and clicked the help button more than 4 hours ago.Can you tell me when you will finally be helping me?
Helpdesk: How may I help you? Customer: I'm writing my first e-mail. Helpdesk: OK, and, what seems to be the problem? Customer: Well, I have the letter a, but how do I get the circle around it?
|
Best Wishes
Nigel
|
|
Sponsored Links
|
|
|
Rhys
Moderator Group
Coffee addict...
Joined: 02-February-2003
Location: from the Latin locātiō
Status: Offline
Points: 10053
|
Posted: 18-January-2005 at 21:09 |
helpdesk: hello, can I help you?
Customer: My cup holder has snapped off..
Helpdesk: cupholder?
Customer: Yes the slide out one..
Helpdesk:...!!!!?????
|
V reg Rustbucket Merc C220 Cdi estate J Reg Saab 900i 16v '63 Ford Anglia 105e deluxe R reg Honda PC50 moped..
No BMW as yet...
|
|
Peter Fenwick
Bavarian-Board Contributor
Joined: 27-August-2003
Location: Lost somewhere in time...
Status: Offline
Points: 6484
|
Posted: 19-January-2005 at 05:14 |
LOL excellent
|
Entering an age of Austerity and now driving a Focus Diesel.
|
|
kbannon
Admin Group
E39 525i Sport Individual
Joined: 09-October-2002
Location: 64 Zoo Lane
Status: Offline
Points: 15508
|
Posted: 19-January-2005 at 05:22 |
Admit it Nigel, you were the caller!
|
Current: 2009 E60 520d "Sport" tractor Previous: 1989 E30 320i SE 1997 E39 523i 2003 E39 525i Sport Individual
|
|
Wonkydog
Senior Member II
Joined: 29-January-2003
Location: United Kingdom
Status: Offline
Points: 196
|
Posted: 19-January-2005 at 14:42 |
Try this place for a laugh,
www.rinkworks.com/stupid
Edited by Wonkydog
|
|
Nigel
Moderator Group
Joined: 09-November-2002
Status: Offline
Points: 6941
|
Posted: 19-January-2005 at 17:35 |
kbannon wrote:
Admit it Nigel, you were the caller! |
Shhhhh you, I've told you about starting rumours !
I suppose you were the smart wotsit on the other end ?
Good job you dont publish some of the questions I've asked you !
|
Best Wishes
Nigel
|
|
kbannon
Admin Group
E39 525i Sport Individual
Joined: 09-October-2002
Location: 64 Zoo Lane
Status: Offline
Points: 15508
|
Posted: 19-January-2005 at 18:01 |
They are all safely stored away for future blackmail use!
|
Current: 2009 E60 520d "Sport" tractor Previous: 1989 E30 320i SE 1997 E39 523i 2003 E39 525i Sport Individual
|
|
Rhys
Moderator Group
Coffee addict...
Joined: 02-February-2003
Location: from the Latin locātiō
Status: Offline
Points: 10053
|
Posted: 19-January-2005 at 18:07 |
kbannon wrote:
They are all safely stored away for future blackmail use! |
Go on Killian, give us an example
|
V reg Rustbucket Merc C220 Cdi estate J Reg Saab 900i 16v '63 Ford Anglia 105e deluxe R reg Honda PC50 moped..
No BMW as yet...
|
|