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lesurely ![]() Really Senior Member II ![]() ![]() Joined: 07-October-2005 Location: The Royal County Status: Offline Points: 889 |
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No.8 yea think I could see myself trying that, No.17 would love to try that on someone I dont like Edited by lesurely |
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e30 325is (deceased)
e36 318is under major construction E39 530D Sport mtec (all the bells and whistles ) Basic unit of laryngitis: 1 hoarsepower lesurely |
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Sponsored Links | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
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Bigian ![]() Really Senior Member II ![]() ![]() Joined: 25-May-2005 Location: Stonehaven Status: Offline Points: 2167 |
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A wee problem with the new $50 bill (this was sent to me so dont hang the passer on)
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If you can't be good don't get caught
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Rhys ![]() Moderator Group ![]() ![]() Coffee addict... Joined: 02-February-2003 Location: from the Latin locātiō Status: Offline Points: 10053 |
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Since when had Al Jolson become president?
As an aside, I reckon the new American president might the chap they need to improve their country a bit - and will probably have some effect over here as well.. ![]() |
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V reg Rustbucket Merc C220 Cdi estate
J Reg Saab 900i 16v '63 Ford Anglia 105e deluxe R reg Honda PC50 moped.. No BMW as yet... |
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thepits ![]() Moderator Group ![]() ![]() Joined: 09-July-2003 Location: far far away Status: Offline Points: 10000473 |
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Aha - a bit of "Black-Humor" of the highest order |
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Cats know your every thought.
But don't care. |
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kbannon ![]() Admin Group ![]() ![]() E39 525i Sport Individual Joined: 09-October-2002 Location: 64 Zoo Lane Status: Offline Points: 15508 |
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Anger Management |
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Current: 2009 E60 520d "Sport" tractor
Previous: 1989 E30 320i SE 1997 E39 523i 2003 E39 525i Sport Individual |
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thepits ![]() Moderator Group ![]() ![]() Joined: 09-July-2003 Location: far far away Status: Offline Points: 10000473 |
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Cats know your every thought.
But don't care. |
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Rhys ![]() Moderator Group ![]() ![]() Coffee addict... Joined: 02-February-2003 Location: from the Latin locātiō Status: Offline Points: 10053 |
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V reg Rustbucket Merc C220 Cdi estate
J Reg Saab 900i 16v '63 Ford Anglia 105e deluxe R reg Honda PC50 moped.. No BMW as yet... |
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thepits ![]() Moderator Group ![]() ![]() Joined: 09-July-2003 Location: far far away Status: Offline Points: 10000473 |
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Cats know your every thought.
But don't care. |
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Jack735 ![]() Bavarian-Board Contributor ![]() ![]() Joined: 14-September-2005 Location: Edinburgh Status: Offline Points: 1055 |
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I never understand why people say that onions are the only vegetable that make you cry ... they've obviously never been hit in the face with a turnip http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=iuMo1nkMztA
Love the anger management KB |
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Oooh, The machine of a dream, such a clean machine With the pistons a pumpin', and the alloys all gleam, When I'm holding your wheel, All I hear is your gear, With my hand on your grease gun, Mmm it's like a disease son, I'm in love with my car, gotta feel for my automobile, Get a grip on my .......
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thepits ![]() Moderator Group ![]() ![]() Joined: 09-July-2003 Location: far far away Status: Offline Points: 10000473 |
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DIVORCE VS MURDER |
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Cats know your every thought.
But don't care. |
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thepits ![]() Moderator Group ![]() ![]() Joined: 09-July-2003 Location: far far away Status: Offline Points: 10000473 |
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A man asked his wife what she'd like for her birthday. 'I'd love to be eight again" she replied.
'Well Dear, what was it like being eight again?"
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Cats know your every thought.
But don't care. |
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lesurely ![]() Really Senior Member II ![]() ![]() Joined: 07-October-2005 Location: The Royal County Status: Offline Points: 889 |
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Bubba's sister is pregnant and is in a bad car accident, which caused her to fall into a deep coma. After nearly six months, she awakens and sees that she is no longer pregnant. Frantically, she asks the doctor about her baby. The doctor replies, "Ma'am, you had twins -- a boy and a girl. The babies are fine. Your brother came in and named them." The woman thinks to herself, "Oh, no! Not Bubba; he's an idiot!" Expecting the worst, she asks the doctor, "Well, what's the girl's name?" "Denise," the doctor answers. The new mother thinks, "Wow! That's a beautiful name! I guess I was wrong about my brother. I really like the name Denise." Then she asks the doctor, "What's the boy's name?" The doctor replies, "Denephew." |
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e30 325is (deceased)
e36 318is under major construction E39 530D Sport mtec (all the bells and whistles ) Basic unit of laryngitis: 1 hoarsepower lesurely |
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kbannon ![]() Admin Group ![]() ![]() E39 525i Sport Individual Joined: 09-October-2002 Location: 64 Zoo Lane Status: Offline Points: 15508 |
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Tak on the Honda advert...
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Current: 2009 E60 520d "Sport" tractor
Previous: 1989 E30 320i SE 1997 E39 523i 2003 E39 525i Sport Individual |
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steven.seed ![]() Really Senior Member II ![]() ![]() Joined: 24-June-2005 Location: Sale, Cheshire Status: Offline Points: 1507 |
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Scots logic. A man in Scotland calls his son in London the day before Christmas Eve and says, 'I hate to ruin your day, but I have to tell you that your mother and I are divorcing; forty-five years of misery is enough.' |
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1998 E36 318iS Saloon
1989 E30 318i. Coupe 2000 E39 520i Touring ![]() |
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Jack735 ![]() Bavarian-Board Contributor ![]() ![]() Joined: 14-September-2005 Location: Edinburgh Status: Offline Points: 1055 |
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An engineer, of the BMW Corporation died and went to heaven. At the gates St. Peter told him, "Since you've been such a good man and your vehicles have changed the world, your reward is, you can hang out with anyone you want in Heaven".
The Engineer thought about it for a minute and then said, "I want to hang out with God." St. Peter took him to the Throne Room, and introduced him to God. He then asked God, "Hey, aren't you the inventor of woman?" God said, "Ah, yes." "Well," said the engineer, "professional to professional, you have some major design flaws in your invention. (1) There' s too much inconsistency in the front-end protrusion. (2) It chatters constantly at high speeds. (3) Most of the rear ends are too soft and wobble too much. (4) The intake is placed way to close to the exhaust. And finally, (5) The maintenance costs are outrageous." "Hmmm, you may have some good points there," replied God, "Hold on." God went to his Celestial super computer, typed in a few words and waited for the results. The computer printed out a slip of paper and God read "Well, it may be true that my invention is flawed," God said to the engineer, "but according to these numbers, more men are riding my invention than yours." |
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Oooh, The machine of a dream, such a clean machine With the pistons a pumpin', and the alloys all gleam, When I'm holding your wheel, All I hear is your gear, With my hand on your grease gun, Mmm it's like a disease son, I'm in love with my car, gotta feel for my automobile, Get a grip on my .......
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kbannon ![]() Admin Group ![]() ![]() E39 525i Sport Individual Joined: 09-October-2002 Location: 64 Zoo Lane Status: Offline Points: 15508 |
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The Hormone Guide
Women will understand this! Men should memorise it! Every woman knows that there are days in the month when all a man has to do is open his mouth and he takes his life in his hands! This is a handy guide that should be as common as a driver's license in the wallet of every husband, boyfriend, co-worker or significant other!
1. Pass My Shotgun 2. Psychotic Mood Shift 3. Perpetual Munching Spree 4. Puffy Mid-Section 5. People Make me Sick 6. Provide Me with Sweets 7. Pardon My Sobbing 8. Pimples May Surface 9. Pass My Sweat pants 10. Pissy Mood Syndrome 11. Plainly; Men Suck 12. Pack My Stuff 13. Potential Murder Suspect |
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Current: 2009 E60 520d "Sport" tractor
Previous: 1989 E30 320i SE 1997 E39 523i 2003 E39 525i Sport Individual |
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lesurely ![]() Really Senior Member II ![]() ![]() Joined: 07-October-2005 Location: The Royal County Status: Offline Points: 889 |
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e30 325is (deceased)
e36 318is under major construction E39 530D Sport mtec (all the bells and whistles ) Basic unit of laryngitis: 1 hoarsepower lesurely |
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kbannon ![]() Admin Group ![]() ![]() E39 525i Sport Individual Joined: 09-October-2002 Location: 64 Zoo Lane Status: Offline Points: 15508 |
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Current: 2009 E60 520d "Sport" tractor
Previous: 1989 E30 320i SE 1997 E39 523i 2003 E39 525i Sport Individual |
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kbannon ![]() Admin Group ![]() ![]() E39 525i Sport Individual Joined: 09-October-2002 Location: 64 Zoo Lane Status: Offline Points: 15508 |
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Current: 2009 E60 520d "Sport" tractor
Previous: 1989 E30 320i SE 1997 E39 523i 2003 E39 525i Sport Individual |
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kbannon ![]() Admin Group ![]() ![]() E39 525i Sport Individual Joined: 09-October-2002 Location: 64 Zoo Lane Status: Offline Points: 15508 |
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Current: 2009 E60 520d "Sport" tractor
Previous: 1989 E30 320i SE 1997 E39 523i 2003 E39 525i Sport Individual |
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