Nony mouse rides again

They seek them here, they seek them there, those D****ed elusive noymice - with their keys!

Come on everyone, 16 pages the last one in lets than 24 hours, less have some mindless drivel!

Rhys wrote: A duck walks into a bar and asks the barman, "do you have any bread?" The barman replies "sorry, I have no bread." The duck pauses, then asks again, "do you have any bread?" The barman replies again, "no, I have no bread." ......."Do you have any bread?" "No I have no bread." "Do you have any bread?" "No I have no bread." "Do you have any bread?" "No I have no bread." "Do you have any bread?" "No I have no bread." "Do you have any bread?" "No I have no bread." "Do you have any bread?" "No I have no bread." "Do you have any bread?" "No I have no bread." "Do you have any bread?" "No I have no bread." "Do you have any bread?" "No I have no bread." "Do you have any bread?" The barman, now furious, then replies "If you ask 'do I have any bread' one more time, I will hammer your beak to the bar!" There's a long pause, then the duck asks "...............Do you have any nails?" The barman replies "This is a bar! Why would I have any nails?!" "................Do you have any bread?"

what a start   

morning lads, ladies and ladyboys (you know who you are!)

Ally, as soon as you left the previous thread seriously nosedived into the unknown depths of of bad taste! Still 16 pages of drivel is not to be sneezed at.

Rhys after reading that joke words fail me.... have you also stopped your medication??

On with the madness................................. 20 pages by midnight!!!

Goldryder wrote: What a start, I agree...but PLEASE RHYS keep Niggles busy elsewhere...

yes i quite agree, take him away.  

Goldryder wrote: Right...well Ise here to play for a while..probably til at least 10pm ish this evening...(apart from when I got to get wheeliebin from the back of the house to the roadway out front which I hate doing but it has to be done) Let the frivolities begin..

is that a wheeliebin full of frilly undergarments that Rhys & Ivan are trying to deny all knowlege of?

A husband desperate to end an argument offers to buy is wife a new car.
She curtly declines his offer by saying, "That's not quite what I had in mind."
Frantically he offers her a new house.
Again she rejects his offer, "That's not quite what I had in mind."
Curious, he asks: "What did you have in mind?"
She retorts, "I'd like a divorce."
He answers, "I hadn't planned on spending quite that much."

A man was walking in the street when he heard a voice. "Stop! Stand still! If you take one more step, a brick will fall down on your head and kill you." The man stopped and a big brick fell right in front of him. The man was astonished.
He went on, and after awhile he was going to cross the road. Once again the voice shouted: "Stop! Stand still! If you take one more step a car will run over you and you will die." The man did as he was instructed, just as a car came careening around the corner, barely missing him.
"Where are you?" the man asked. "Who are you?"
"I am your guardian angel," the voice answered.
"Oh yeah?" the man asked. "And where the hell were you when I got married?"

A farmer and his brand new bride were riding home from the chapel in a wagon pulled by a team of horses, when the older horse stumbled.
The farmer said, "That's once."
A little further along, the poor old horse stumbled again.
The farmer said, "That's twice."
After a little, while the poor old horse stumbled again. The farmer didn't say anything, but reached under the seat, pulled out a shotgun and shot the horse.
His brand new bride raised all kind of hell with him, telling him, "That was an awful thing to do."
The farmer said, "That's once."